Making amends... even when they don't remember.

Tonight I went to a meeting, ran into a few people I know from the past. First I'll say that I have been really balking at the whole amends thing when it comes to a certain person. I met him in 2007 at a meeting and dated him in a weird sort of way, but I wasn't finished yet and I was a total b!t@# towards him then. I didn't want to say I was sorry for anything because I felt he was a total butthole. So- I approached him tonight because he was talking to a friend of mine and I couldn't just ignore him. He was saying hello and telling me I looked really familiar. I reminded him who I was, or tried to, but he didn't remember any of the situation. I just kinda slipped in and said, if you do remember, I'm really sorry for everything I did back then. And that felt good. To have been able to apologize, even though it wasn't a big deal to him, but he also apologized to me if he'd done anything back then. I was so not spiritually fit at that point, and I was on the verge of relapse anyway. That was cool.
Another situation, I heard someone sharing- her name came first and I looked over at her and realized that she was someone I was acquainted with. She's been sober for like eighteen months. At the end of the meeting I told her I was proud of her and then introduced myself, telling her where she knew me from. She gave me a huge hug and we spoke to each other for a while. It was a good night, the whole day was good actually. I know today though, that every day is a good day if I look at it the right way... if I can take a step back and acknowledge the positive in every situation, no matter how bad it might look at first, things seem to fall into place.
I was able to see quite a few people I know, I hadn't been at the Hope for quite a while because I was upset with the directors there based on something I took too personally. Tonight I decided to ignore the delusional thinking that they don't like me there... a lot of people were actually glad to see me- to see me doing well too. A beautiful day.
I was invited by the guy I made amends to, to go out to have coffee or whatever with a bunch of guys... I had to decline. For the first time in my life I'm seeing it as a bit disrespectful to hang out with the guys, especially since I'm seeing someone right now. I don't know how to explain it, I just feel more tied to one person and I don't want him to get the wrong idea, hearing that I went and met up with other dudes... whatever. I'm ok with that too. I feel good about saying no to that, dude was like, I'm not trying to hook up or anything, just wanted you to come hang out. I, as politely as possible, told him that I feel uncomfortable with it right now. Fact is, I don't know how the person I'm seeing would react, and I'd rather get his opinion on the matter before I make a decision that could hurt him, even if it's as innocent as just chillin with the peeps. Things mean more to me now, I have to look at everything I do, and not give anyone the wrong impression of me. I like my life now and there's no reason whatsoever to complicate things that way. I would rather have people making up stories out of nothing than taking something and twisting it to cause chaos for me. Whatever- I'm just glad I woke up this morning and was able to experience this awesome program one more day, one more time... so, until tomorrow- I hope you will sleep in peace and wake up tomorrow being blessed by the Lord in many ways. Much love... me